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Whipped

hi this is my first time on this blog in 4 years and i just found this in my drafts- its a transcription of friend's reaction to the porn tag while we were facetiming (at 3am in like 2014, so we were like 16)
Friendl: That must hurt. youre white and he's black.
Friend: Is that a blimp or a dildo
Friend: Oh its over dammit
Friend: Woah woah woah woah
Friend: Theres so many gifs
Friend: Penis ew
Friend: Ew this girls hairy as hell
Im scared, blanca, <i>shes really hairy<i/>
Friend: Why u so oily eww did they do that purposely
Friend: Wowowowow thats so weird like thats what it looks like
Friend: Asians have really small boobs
And not all black girls have bug butts
Friend: Thats what it looks like...
Friend: ew y is your booty whole stretched like that *whispering* i don't think thats normal
Friend: Woah asians are weir- WOAH SHES GOT THE WHOLE THING IN HER MOUTH *whispering* im scared...
Friend: Why are asians so- they like to be punished
Friend: That is a hairbrush why is it in your vagina
Friend: Oh my god is that lady gaga oh my god its not
Friend: what the frick people can bend that way
Friend: WHY ARE YOU STICKING STOCKING IN YOUR VAGINA
Friend: you cant do that to army guys they're supposed to protect our country not your vagina
Friend: woah she got the booty
Friend: why are you smacking her vagina? this guys smacking her vagina like your supposed to be nice, right?
Me: yea
Friend: yea
Friend: <i>oh my god thats disgusting, this girl, oh my god oh my god im scarred for life<i/>
Me: what
Friend: <i>i will never look at a horse the same<i/>
Posted on 2nd Sep at 2:36 AM, with 18 notes

monumentwentz:

2016 grammy’s predictions

  • song of the year - uptown funk
  • record of the year - uptown funk
  • best pop group performance - uptown funk
  • best country performance - uptown funk
  • best dance recording - uptown funk
  • best rock performance - uptown funk
  • best rap performance - uptown funk
  • best gospel song - uptown funk
  • best latin jazz performance - uptown funk
  • best new artist - uptown funk
Posted on 5th Nov at 10:03 PM, with 30,651 notes

j4ya:

oh mY GOD I DON’T REMEMBER MAKING THIS BUT I’M LAUGHING ALL OVER AGAIN???

Posted on 5th Nov at 10:01 PM, with 237 notes

The comments when the fandom found Melissa’s Instagram

Posted on 12th Jun at 2:08 PM, with 3 notes
dog person: we have a purebred border collie with a bernese twist
cat person: this is rita we love her she's orange
Posted on 7th Apr at 9:59 PM, with 710,996 notes

dazzling-hollyhock:

Adorable baby girl being chased by daddy, finally takes a stand.

OMG MY HEART

“DAD!”

*gibberish*

Posted on 7th Apr at 9:12 PM, with 937,983 notes

heart:

thebatmanofjokes:

heart:

why is it so hard to get out of bed

Because the laws dictates that an object at rest tends to stay the fuck in bed because moving is the worst

oh yeah I forgot. thank you for reminding me about Newton’s first law
Posted on 27th Mar at 8:36 AM, with 245,318 notes

vulvapeople:

whiskey-and-ink:

I think men overall just don’t understand that we cannot stop the blood. If there’s nothing to collect it, it’s going everywhere. Everyone can hold a shit, can hold a piss, and can hold back sex, until it’s convenient. When we bleed there is just no stopping it. It doesn’t matter if there’s nothing to catch the blood, it will keep coming.

That’s why this free-tampon discussion is over your heads. You don’t get it. You can compare it to toilet paper or condoms all you want but we all have control over those things. When we bleed, we keep bleeding until it’s done. There’s no clenching or muscle training that will keep us from bleeding everywhere.

So stop talking about what you don’t understand. If condoms can be free, so can tampons.

Also, toilet paper is free in public restrooms.  Everyone would lose their shit if they had to buy toilet paper at work.

Posted on 27th Mar at 8:34 AM, with 463,374 notes